Get Thee to New Bond Street!!!

One of the best things about living in London is how it makes serendipity happen!

I watched a documentary about Dale Chihuly – glass artist extraordinaire – work online and was just blown away by his work process and how he uses teams to bring his vision to life.  I first saw his work in Chicago as ‘office art’ – very cool seaforms.  Then in Las Vegas I was entranced by the ceiling of the Bellagio lobby and the explosion of colourful flowers.  A few years later I was stunned by his piece in the lobby of Abravanel Hall in Salt Lake City, a fiery explosion of red.

So, this documentary (‘Chihuly in the HotShop’) renewed and piqued my interest, causing me to search online where I  discovered Chihuly’s work – including spectacular new black pieces – are being exhibited at the Halcyon Gallery in London. We went, we were awed and inspired — and if you live in London you must go immediately!

My favorite is the white sconces with palest blue at the center, closely followed by the blue/lavender/aqua chandelier in the front window.  AMAZING!  Check out the dreamscape installations that are just fantasy come to life – unbelievable colours, astounding craftsmanship, perfectly balanced, all illuminated with gorgeous light.   It’s like seeing a new life form of light and liquid.

Go absorb some beauty in your life and tell me what you think! Xx C

Goodbye Chubby Girl

Losing weight should make you feel great, right? Well… maybe not. Even after losing weight, women still perceive themselves as being overweight and self-esteem doesn’t improve as the weight comes off.

Purdue University has published a study on the psychological effects of weight loss in teenage girls and found that while losing weight improves physical health, perceptions of negative self-image stay the same.

Researchers tracked 2000 teenage girls for ten years – from age 9 to 19, evaluating their weight and self-esteem. The girls’ self-esteem didn’t remain poor because they continued to see themselves as heavy, just that there was no improvement in self-esteem from losing weight.

“Studies show that children internalize stereotypes and negative perceptions of obese people before they ever become obese themselves, so when they do enter that stigmatized state, it affects their sense of self-worth. Then, whether they are gaining or losing weight, the negative message they have internalized and feelings of worthless may stick with them,” added Mustillo.

This is a vicious cycle that leads to a lifetime of self image and body issues. I believe this transcends teenage girls and applies to women at large – it’s unlikely that this perception would miraculously change in adulthood. Letting go of the ‘chubby girl’ inside, or the ‘ugly duckling’ takes focus.

Are you trying to let go of the negative past? Your practice: Start by closing your eyes, breathing, and visualizing the girl you were – see her as if you were watching her in a film on a giant movie screen. As you watch, the screen gets smaller and smaller and smaller until it fades to black completely. Open your eyes and look at your ‘real’ body now – how is she different? How is she beautiful? Say to yourself, out loud, “I am beautiful and the perfect weight. I am not fat anymore. I am healthy.”

Notice how you think about yourself and commit to making the way you see yourself reflect who you are, not who you were…

Xx
C

Fingernail Triage!

My manicure OCD is no secret… but I tell you, the nails have had a hard couple of weeks!!!

Let’s learn some things, shall we?

1 – Don’t let anyone do weird stuff to your nails in a foreign country. I searched for a Shellac salon whilst I was traveling and needed a refresh. Booked the appointment, made it clear I wanted SHELLAC, and when I showed up she had something else weird. I asked questions and ended up letting her do the manicure that must’ve been a combination of a gel manicure but she used an acrylic type base. Weird!! It ended up chipping within hours, crackling by the next day and by the time I got back to my regular London manicurist we were in a hot mess. Getting it off was another drama – acetone soak for 10 mins… nothing. Roughed up surface and another 10 min acetone soak… nothing. She ended up eventually having to GRIND IT OFF and then do another Shellac over the top. End result was 2 hours and £70. Lesson learned!

Then, I was dashing out the door from an appointment and ended up slamming my index finger in the burglar bar. Ouch!

I have now learned a lot about the nail and that the matrix (the thing that makes it grow…) is important. I didn’t break the finger and the nail is holding on, but it is a science experiment in slow motion here. Let’s see what happens?

The amazing news is, it crushed my finger, actually pulverized the cuticle, but the Shellac survived?!!! Can you imagine?! I think the Shellac probably saved me from cracking the nail and it falling off.

So: what have we learned?

(1) Don’t let strangers put semi-permanent things on your body. Next time, politely say “I’ll just have a regular manicure, thanks!”

(2) Watch your fingertips in doors!

(3) Gloves are good…

Here’s to a happier week!

C

Why I love Emma Joe

I’m hanging out in The Hague a bit lately (that’s in the Netherlands which is also Holland, but Holland is a part of NL which is bigger – it confused me even when I read it on Wikipedia, but good to have a geography lesson!)

So, in this very charming city full of museums – Girl with a Pearl Earring (real one, not Scarlett Johannsen) is here, and a very cool Escher museum (graphic artist who made the freaky bird into a fish woodcuts that you should definitely check out, again, movie reference to Inception and the never-ending staircases – see image below so I feel like we’ve had an art lesson, too) – anyway, with all this art and architecture and beauty my new absolutely favourite place is Emma Joe!  www.emmajoe.nl  They had me at their tagline “Emma Joe Loves Life:  Very, Very special bags, perfumes, and jewelry” — If you threw in shoes I would probably have had an aneurysm on the spot from bliss-overload.

Cool Escher woodcut

So, how, might you ask, did Coni find this little treasure off the beaten path?  Well, I’ve been eco friendly and taking the number 17 tram through Den Haag to my client’s office. En route as we whiz by I kept getting ‘Coni Radar’ blips as we would pass this little shop with cool handbags, or is it jewelry, or is it perfume? Little flashes so fast they didn’t even register.  It confused me because (a) I have no internal GPS and I thought it was different shops for about a week and (b) they change their display all the time and (c) who would ever have a perfume/handbag/jewelry shop?! Emma Joe, that’s who!

Today was pretty grey and I’m getting over a cold, so I perked myself up with late-night shopping in The Hague and my radar led me straight to Emma Joe’s.  Unspeakably cool stuff to be had. I fell in love love love with the pieces by Bea Valdes – amazing amazing amazing. Hands down the coolest bodyarmour/neckwear and the gem of a ruby handbag that looks like Snow White’s apple just plopped at your feet.  I so000 fell in love, looked at the price tag, realized it was just a crush…   Robert, my most talented husband, is working on a new avant garde collection inspired by tribes along with my favourite shoe designer Natacha Marro – and the turquoise neckpiece would be unspeakably cool with the look.  Wow wow wow!  (Maybe it was the cold meds, but really, was blown away by this place!)

Disgustingly GORGEOUS body jewelry from Bea Valdes

Seriously - how much more coolness can there be?!

In a more affordable section of the store, I conquered and bought a gorgeous goldtone cuff bracelet from French jewelery designer Satellite http://www.satelliteparis-boutique.com/ that I can’t wait to wear – have been craving one since I missed buying one at the duty free in Bahrain about a million years ago.

Craving this blue Satellite necklace too … Wow!

Necklace from Satellite Paris

Just too much beauty in one shop!

I didn’t even start on the handbags lining the walls.  It was just too much for one girl to take.  I did spy behind the register a nifty bag that looks like a recycled computer keyboard – so my next mission is to check it out and see if I love it and can afford!

Get thee to Emma Joe next time you’re on the 17 Tram in Den Haag…  prepare to be stunned.

xx C

Personal Branding Online for New College Grads

The millennial generation (born between 1980-2000) will form 50% of the global workforce by 2020 according to a report by Price Waterhouse Coopers.

With so much competition in the job market, personal branding is key to help university and college students stand out from a sea of graduates.

A personal brand is the ‘X’ factor that makes you stand out from the pack. Your personal brand packages your achievements, knowledge, skills and outlook on goals and presents them in person and online.

Treating your image like a brand means you are focused on what’s positive, compelling and unique about you – and that will enhance your credibility with interviewers, increase your value, and improve your confidence. When you’re reflecting your brand, you’re in the ‘zone’ and you shine.

It’s critical that your online presence matches who you are in the face to face interview. The resume used to be the key document – now it’s your online profiles. “It’s important for students to accurately portray themselves online as they would in-person,” says Mr. Davidson, Talent Acquisition Manager,PwC Canada. “Having a profile you wouldn’t be ashamed to show your parents on all of the major social networks—LinkedIn, Facebook, Twitter and Google Profiles—is the first step in managing your online reputation.”

One way to stand out is to do your homework and apply to companies that align with your values. Go online and research everything you can about the company you want to work for – their values, CSR practices, financial results, etc. Do they believe in the same things you believe in? If so, your brands might match – making you a stronger candidate. Make sure your values show up in your online presence. If you care about human rights, show it in your links and connections. If you care about the impending energy crisis, follow companies that are working to resolve the problem. According to the millennial report in 2008, 88% of respondents questioned said they were looking for an employer with CSR values that reflected their own. The brands that appeal to young people as consumers include those that stress their environment and social record, are the same brands that appeal to them as employers.

The next step is to network. Add a LinkedIn profile and build your online resume. Make sure you have recommendations by people who you have worked with or who know you well. What if you’ve never worked? Tap into your church, community, family friends, anyone who is a professional, on LinkedIn, knows you well, and will recommend you. Also make sure your profile statement reflects who you are and what you want.

Join the discussion on PwC’s Recruiting Facebook page: www.pwc.com/ca/campusfacebook

Follow PwC Canada Personal Brand Week on Twitter at @PwC_ca_campus

Beautiful Stars Actually Boost Your Self Image

Can photos of Taylor Swift be good for your self image? Maybe...

It’s been vogue to blame thin models and actresses for the average woman’s self image woes for years. Feel bad about your body? It must be Angelina Jolie’s fault.
Well, maybe not.  If svelte goddesses such as Taylor Swift and Karlie Kloss really hurt our egos so much, then why do we buy the magazines with them on the cover; the clothes, handbags and water they advertise; why do we buy Barbies for heaven’s sake?

A new study flies in the face of conventional wisdom and says that women buy because we connect. We look at a beautiful, engaging woman that we like, or feel a connection with and we get a boost.
“Ironically, it may be that we don’t need to reject thin celebrities but rather make women feel closer to them in order to allow these protective benefits,” says Ariana Young, who led the study.
In “The Skinny on Celebrities: Parasocial Relationships Moderate the Effects of Thin Media Figures on Women’s Body Image,” published this month in the journal Social Psychological and Personality Science, the researcher argues that seeing skinny models or celebrities can actually make us feel better about ourselves.
The study centers on two components: commonality and likeability.
If we think we share something in common with the celeb (in this study, women who thought they shared a birthday with a slender model felt better about their bodies after seeing her photo than women who felt they had nothing common with the model) we feel better about ourselves as well.
Second, we have to like her.

I think of this as the Miranda Kerr effect. Of all the Victoria’s Secret models, she seems the ‘nicest.’  Yeah, she’s married to Orlando Bloom and, yeah, she shows no signs of having given birth, but she just seems nice. Even wearing lingerie and wings – she still seems adorable and sweet.

Ditto Heidi Klum. Ditto Gwyneth Paltrow. In the study, when women were shown one of their favorite thin celebrities, they felt better about their own figures than when shown thin celebrities who they didn’t like.

The idea, says Young, is that we tend to assume a likeness between ourselves and the people we admire. ‘Assimiliation’ is term used to describe the effect that basically we think we’re just like them.

(I would hazard a theory that this goes beyond thin models, by the way to include ‘beautiful’ and ‘talented’ in general. I see Adele on this month’s cover of Vogue and I like Adele – she’s amazingly talented and beautiful. So, I see her, I like her, I feel better about myself. If I see a magazine with someone I don’t like, say, Blake Lively, I won’t get the same happy glow even is she’s skinny and beautiful and talented.)
The “parasocial” (one-sided) relationship we establish with these slender celebs therefore protects us from potentially low self-esteem. We did the same thing when we were young – we liked Barbie, who for the vast majority of women is as ‘imaginary’ as Beyonce or Reese Witherspoon, actually – so we played with her and she became our friend. She didn’t psychologically torture us and cause us to become bulimic or anorexic – that happens for other reasons. So let’s cut skinny girls some slack.
When women feel a personal connection to a thin celebrity, researchers find they’re more likely to assimilate than to contrast. In other words, seeing their favourite slim star in a magazine actually gives their self-image a boost because they assume likeness – much the way spouses focus on the similarities, and not the differences, between them.
“Ironically, it may be that we don’t need to reject thin celebrities, but rather make women feel closer to them in order to allow these protective benefits,” says Young. It’s a controversial notion, to be sure. But across multiple experiments with some 150 college women, it consistently proved true these parasocial relationships are okay.
According to Young, the message for magazines wanting to showcase slim women is that they can reduce the potential for harm by using models or stars that are widely admired by fellow females.
She also adds that it’s “not surprising” nearly all previous body image research has shown women feel worse about their bodies after exposure to thin media images, since a contrast effect occurs when there’s no relationship with the person pictured. It’s only when women feel a personal connection that the paradigm appears to be flipped. “We assimilate the traits of our favourite celebrities the way we do a real close other, such as a friend,” explains Young, a PhD candidate at the University at Buffalo. “So, having a parasocial bond with favourite celebrities is actually protective, and may even be beneficial for women’s body image.”
Paradoxically, earlier studies have shown a link between body image concerns and one-sided relationships with skinny stars. This correlation has previously been interpreted as evidence that waifish media darlings are harmful to self-esteem.
In light of the latest findings, however, Young proposes that it may instead be that women who dislike their bodies are drawn to thin celebrities and models because the images make them feel better about themselves. “If we know that women are assimilating the body traits of their favourite celebrities, we might assume that they seek out those celebrities when they’re feeling low,” says Young, who is currently investigating this theory further.

The findings align with the principles of positive psychology – that we’re attracted to individuals who we find affirming and reinforcing.  If we like someone and identify with her, and that person is beautiful physically, it makes sense that we feel positive.  So if you’re feeling low, find images of your ‘go-to’ celebs, the ones you like, admire, and think are beautiful, talented amazing women.  Think about the character traits you like about that woman that you find in yourself.  Identify examples of how you embody those traits (generosity, humour, grace, persistence, positivity, bravery, etc) and turn that icon into a reminder of how amazing you are as well.

Internet Dating Do’s and Dont’s: Pictures Matter!

Consider the time and energy advertisers put into selecting images to represent their brands. They pay actresses and models enormous sums of money, photographers, stylists, makeup, hair, lighting and set design all to get the perfect picture that says ‘It.’

When you’re choosing your photo (and – in case you were wondering – you should ALWAYS use a photo! No photo = I’m married and don’t want my spouse to find out…)

There are many choices to be made about facial expressions, background, camera angles, and whether or not to be ‘interesting.’ In general, you’re going to attract the fish you’re baiting – so a cleavage shot or no-shirt shot is going to get you the attention you want. That said, how can the ‘average’ internet dater be authentic and still attract attention to his/her profile without resorting to body parts (which, let’s face it, are a bit pathetic the older you get… If you’re over 30, you should keep things under wraps!)

Your choices:

1 – To smile or not to smile?

You have three options:

(a) smile,

(b) no smile,

(c) flirty smile.

(d) kissy face (just so you know – this isn’t a real option – never ever ever do this because it makes you look like a silly fish…)

For a woman, the right answer is (a) smile. Not too cheesy, not trying to be sexy because that’s just gross and hard to pull off without looking ridiculous. So, do your best to have a natural, friendly pleasant smile.

For a man the right answer is (b) no smile. Give a little attitude, a little edge. Too smiley is too much and we want a little mystery.

2 – Where to look?

(a) look to camera

(b) look out into the distance

For a woman, the right answer is (a) look to camera. Looking away is a hard one to pull off and makes you seem distant. You want to connect with the guy looking at your profile.

For men (b) look off into the distance somewhere. Again, she wants mystery and is wondering where you’re looking and what you’re thinking. However, don’t go all “Le Tigre” a la Ben Stiller in Zoolander.

3 – What sort of angle and setup?

(a) self photo sitting in a regular room (the classic Facebook photo)

(b) in bed

(c) outside

(d) with friends

(e) with a pet

(f) doing something interesting

(g) showing off

For women, (a) is the best option to get views from guys. Just a straight up photo that looks like you took it yourself. It shows you’re not too vain, gives the guy a sense that he’s seeing the ‘real’ you, and can be sexy. Do not take photos of you with your girlfriends or cat, or photos of you outside in the dappled sunlight. He just wants straight up you – simple makeup and hair, just like you’re hanging out at home, not going to prom. Now, do make sure your room is tidy in the background and no sexy pouty lip or you look like you run your own porn website…

For guys, sadly, women want you to show off. They want to see you doing something interesting, with your pet, or emphasizing that you’re fit and hot is good. If you’re not fit and hot, try to find a good angle.

4: What to wear?

Something simple – don’t get dressed up but try to wear something that looks normal. Jeans, reasonable t-shirt, basic dress.

5 – Should I be ‘interesting’?

About animals and ‘something interesting’ – if you want to find a real partner and these things are important to you (you like your cat/dog; you are an avid diver/hiker/climber/skier; you enjoy camping/fishing/traveling) it’s okay to have a photo that shows you doing those things or wearing things that you would wear whilst doing those things. Your odds are greater of attracting someone who is really interested in you and wants to do the same things you do. If, however, you want quantity over quality – eg you just want people to email you – then go with the straight up casual clothes, self photo in a room.

You may also choose to post a photo that’s not of your face – seriously. Faces are overrated. If it’s intriguing and represents you, why not? (Don’t get all naughty – I’m not talking about a straight-up nude body part shot though one woman’s choice of blue bondage ropes is interesting and will definitely attract a certain type of male, which, frankly, is probably what she wants and so why not?) But you could effectively post a photo of you where you can’t really see your face – doing something ‘interesting’ or even showing something cool that you like and is provocative.